"Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habits. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny." -- unknown

Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results - Albert Einstein

the story of my life
April 17, 2002 - 5:41 pm

i was asked out to long island for a farewell lunch by one customer in the know. that was nice. i don't want to go.

i'm really tempted to start my own webpage where i can post essay type things. i used to do a lot of entries about the world i see...i havn't so much anymore. i'm not sure why. i still think that way, but i guess i just feel that they don't belong in this diary. i've tried to start websites before and they all failed miserably.

there's a lot of white skin out there today. i like white skin. i like tan lines too.

i used to have a semi-phobia about tanning and skin cancer. i could quote stats on how many people get it and die each year...i just avoid the sun a lot now.

i dislike it when things end. i really dislike lingering endings. it's slow and painful. fast is better. a big flourish. that's just me.

do not go gentle into that good night.

which is ironic since my current life pattern means i'm going to do just that. i lack..i lack the get up and go or rather a reason to. i could, but i want a reason. the reason, perhaps the best, that i should cause i want to, doesn't seem to cut it.

perhaps i just have no self-esteem.

my head itches.

i think i might close my windows and turn the ac on. i fucking hate the traffic noise.

do you, yes you, ever check your email? i know i've sent few to you and you've only replied like once. oh well, the story of my life.