"Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habits. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny." -- unknown

Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results - Albert Einstein

curiosity rears it's nosey nose
September 22, 2006 - 6:14 am

i like to ferret out the truth.. the reasoning behind things. i revel in knowing a little bit about a lot.. and, on occasion, knowing a lot about a little.

present me with a puzzle, a riddle.. and i'll tilt my head and ponder. perhaps not for long, for not just anything gets my attention. that's probably the hardest part for me to understand: why do certain things get my attention.

could be the easiest thing for someone who knows me to explain. very likely one of things.. that i'm too close to it to really understand. forest meet trees. trees meet forest.

one thing i'm nosey about.. is checking from time to time who comes here. the same places popup more often than not and i always wonder "why the fuck do you keep reading here?"

i suppose i'm like a trainwreck in slow motion. perhaps i should start expecting an email/note saying "get to the goddamn crash already!"

anyway. from time to time aol shows up. it's a huge isp.. and there's no way to know who it is. part of me smiles everytime i see it and part of me kicks into high analytical gear.. as if there's some way to flush out who it is.

of course, part of me feels sad too.. how many pars do i have? are they equal? i've no idea..

sometimes, the curiosity bug kicks into higher gear than others.. and i'll check your page. sometimes there's an entry around the same day/time.. and sometimes not. usually not.

that's a long winded intro to what's actaully on my mind, eh?

i've no idea if it's random chance when you post and when some other aol person looks... and that's not what i want to get into.

i liked the last entry. in fact, i think it's something i could have written.. only much less to the point, much less concise than yours. it brought me back to something i posted a bit ago:

"Whatever games are played with us, we must play no games with ourselves."
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson

i think that's a saying i need to add to my page.. i tink it goes rather well with:

"Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habits. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny." -- unknown

which of course, plays nicely, in its own way with:

"Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results" -- Albert Einstein

in other other news.. today's the last day of my 'field visit' and it's woefully clear the training program wasn't at all geared towards what i'm going to be doing.. so stress level is on the rise. though i can't really wig out too much, if i wasn't trained on something, i can't get freaked out that i don't know it, right?

next week.. is the final presentation... which is totally pointless to what i'm going to be doing. i'd like very much to just skip that and start my job for real next week.

i'm also giving serious thought to moving.. to finding a new place to live. i think i might even call a mortgage person this weekend and see just what i can afford.. and, if i get really crazy, see a place or two.

by the way, if you are reading this.. i'm in bloomfield 5 days a week. how's about coffee sometime? that's something normal-folk do right? sit.. talk.. pointless chatter. i like the idea of trying something normal-folk do, not all the time... but every now and then i think it's a nice change. not a bit of insanity, i'm not ready for that.. i know that and understand that so much better now. not a game, not something with ulterior motives or anything like that.