"Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habits. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny." -- unknown

Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results - Albert Einstein

i want support
August 31, 2005 - 7:49 pm

just got a call from my parents.. and, as usual, they piss me off. i don't know why i told them about the interview i have tomorrow.. i knew the call i'd get --
"are you really sure you want to do this?"
"you haven't been where you are very long.."
"well, it seems to me your screwing (though dad didn't say screwing) your boss.."

no fucking shit to all of that. i know all of this. the fact remains, what i'm doing isn't what i want and the working conditions.. suck. did i fuck up by taking the job? yes, yes i did. does it make sense to stick at a job i don't like just to "do the right thing" for the company/boss?

fuck no. the right thing is what's for me. i already did one wrong thing by taking the job. compounding it by missing an opportunity to do something better screws me.

will i ever be able to go back to where i am? no. does this bother me? only if i get fired.. and desperately need a job and can't get mine back -- note, i'd have to be wicked desperate to want to come back.

i get that they are, to a degree, playing devils advocate.. they always do.. but it just irks me to no end that i just can't get simple support from them.

on the other hand, they've above and beyond what they should do for me many a time.. so in a way i'm just being greedy.

still. all i want is some support -- not push-back on what i'm doing.

is that really too much to ask for?