"Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habits. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny." -- unknown

Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results - Albert Einstein

northward bound!
March 27, 2005 - 10:12 pm

i find the prospect both scary and exciting. larger questions loom.. so with this choice virtually a lock, i'll let it fall to the back burner.

i need to do certain things to graduate. things i've not yet done.. and will now be hard to do.

the question is this: do i really care about my degree? if i don't do i care about anything? how much of what i do is simple.. inerta.. is simply doing something for the sake of doing it?

i've also stumbled across.. what i think could be the perfect way to start the story that's locked inside my head. sadly, i need to focus my energies on school. i'm not yet set to give up on it with the finish line in site..

though the question of do i really care or not still lingers.. inerta demands i finish it.

i'm going to make my stab at getting a higher base salary tomorrow.. though my position is very much weakend. i checked my mail today and it seems yesterday i got a letter from the bank, the NC place, and much to my surprise i didn't get an offer.

i'm truly confused by this. i thought i did swimmingly. i must have either botched the interview beyond all comprehension.. and been lied to by the one interviewer. or i must have botched the tests. i think this is more likely. i know i was off, but i didn't think i did that poorly.

i haven't heard from the railroad and i don't care.

so, in truth i have but one offer.. and from this weak position, i'm going to stab at getting a raise. of course, it's not a big risk, since at worst.. i'll take the offer what's given and be happy.

something of a personal issue lingers with going to CT. i'm not sure how to address it.