"Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habits. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny." -- unknown

Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results - Albert Einstein

i'm not who i think i am, are you?
November 22, 2003 - 11:38 pm

i'm ok if it doesn't get read.

in fact, it's probably best if it's not.

a much more mature move would have not been to reply, but we all have our faults and mine.. is i find it very hard not to reply to an email. an even bigger fault is writting emails whilst impassioned on an issue.

that's a cardinal rule of emailing - never send a mail while impassioned. go ahead and write, but reread it when not impassioned, correct and then send.

that's not to say i don't mean the things i sent - i do. though it's how you say things that matter. word choice is key in an email.

on the other hand, i think, after this somewhat fiery exchnage the issue is dead.

in other news, my parents are in town. this sort of bothers me. i'm going to be spending most of the week with them and that means being very, very bored.

our holiday get togethers are mundane to say the least.

i havn't said this in ages on here, but i don't have a family, i have stranges with which i share genes.

along that line, yes i talk on here that i don't see the world like anyone else i know - this does not at all mean i want to see it your way.

i do not.

i lament the fact that i've not met anyone who sees it like i do. though, jon is pretty close.

i lament that i must live in a world that doesn't make sense to me. a world were people act as they think they should, not as they want.

even you who thinks (thought?) that you knew me and liked me.. doesn't know me. in all honestly, never made a true effort to. the vast majority of our online talks were sexaul flirting.

we had some deep conversations, but hardly scratched the surface of each other.

i mean, answer any of these about me:

1) what's my dream? what do i want to do?

2) what's my biggest fear?

3) name some pet peeves?

4) what's my favorite food?

5) what's my favorite color?

6) what color are my eyes?

7) where would i like to live?

8) what's my favorite anything?

9) what are my thoughts on god/religion?

i can't answer those for you, well i could take a stab at a few of them.

perhaps you're finally seeing, as i've said before, i'm not the person you think i am.

i'm not even the person i think i am.