"Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habits. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny." -- unknown

Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results - Albert Einstein

reading books..
January 01, 2003 - 8:13 pm

i've read two now, well one fully and part way through another.

a lot of the things said in the books are very similiar to things i've already thought, or if had explored my line of thinking further would have reached.

i find an odd sense of satisfaction in this.

both the books relate to the state of humanity and our culture and the books state things in much clearer way than i can. it's nice to see something near my own thinking outlined so well.

i also find an sense of saddness. i find that i'm not so interested in the books as i should be. if i had read them perhaps just a year ago i'd be in a very different state, quite excited. i'd be sucking the words in and formulating them into my own thinking, clearing up ideas...strengthening supports.

i'm not doing that. i'm reading the books as a sort of interesting side project.

i've sort of moved on to another line of thinking. it's not that i disagree with anything the books say, i don't...i agree nearly 100%. i'm surprised to see the arguments laid out so nicely. i've even gone so far as to recommened the books to several people.

but the books deal with an entire culture. my focus has fallen from that. it seems i've lost interest in what the fate of us will be.

my interest lays now in what i know is a misguided quest, a quest to find something to make myself happy. i've little interest in being 'saved' or 'saving' humanity.

i merely want to wake up and be happy.