"Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habits. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny." -- unknown

Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results - Albert Einstein

if i go crazy...
2001-10-09 - 9:38 p.m.

thank you three doors down.

my mind is so full of junk it's unreal. i want to go to bed, to drift off to sleep and wake up in a new day. a clean slate. i'm too jazzed up with a million thoughts moshing about inside my skull. i could cry. i could scream. i could toss random items about my place. i could drink copious amounts of alcohol. i could do a lot of things.

i was just thinking of that song by pearl jam, the i wish song. i like songs. i wish i actaully had a 'thing' in my life that made me feel good. a happy thing. a peaceful thing. i wish my mind didn't work the way it did, which is tantamount to saying i wish i was someone else...so i guess that's really my wish.

i think i need laid.

no, no i don't. sex would just add a whole new dimension...a whole new layer of shit to deal with. i need something far more basic than sex. i need something more primal, more fundamental.

i need a friend, someone i can trust.