"Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habits. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny." -- unknown

Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results - Albert Einstein

Go Think!
2001-05-22 - 6:33 p.m.

I woke up today and had the most kick ass story in my head. I didnt have time to write it down, though...and Im angry about that.

Im tryin to work it out again, but the words arnt there. Some words are and Im workin at it, but I lost whatever the inspiration was. Im happy that I did get the concept down and now I just need to get back to the things that made it good.

I think Im going to buy one of those voice recorders and just dictate things. Ive thought of it before, but never have gotten on. If I had had one...Id have the story down in the exact words I had in my head.

Next week Im gonna be the unoffical boss around the office. Im unsure how to act. Theres shit that goes on now if I was the real boss I would tolerate. I guess I shouldnt be any sort of a heavy about things, its only for a week. Steve is off to Paris with his little woman and I get to play rent-a-boss. I should ask him if hes going to many any sort of offical statment to that affect. If he doesnt, I wont really do shit. Im odd that way. Everyone knows thats how its going to be, but its not said, if Im deputized for the week, then Im just another peon...equal to all the other peons. I WANT A BADGE! A bright gold shiney one with pretty points and the word 'bastard' engraved on it. I like the word bastard. I'm not really one though, but I like to play one on the phone now and then. Flex a little company muscle and explain that if X dont happen I wont be buying your stuff, Ill switch everything I see to a competitor. You cant pull that stuff often, but now and then you can and its fun.

Boston Public pissed me off last night. I was simply outraged that kid got passed so he could go to Harvard. I'm watching all these shows and news stories about how voilence is up among kids...about school shootings and what people think is wrong with 'America'. In my ever so humble opinion (feel free to disagree and call me stupid), last nights show showed one the main problems. People like to point to ONE thing like games or movies or parents and say that IS the cause. It's not that simple folks, this is a complex and fundamental change we seem to be going through. The biggest issue, as I see it, is that people (not just kids) dont think they are responsible for thier actions anymore.

Take last nights show. For those of you dont watch Boston Public, there was a student who was accepted into Harvard...a first for this particular Boston public school. The problem came when the kid decided to blow off his final semster and coast into college, like alot of kids do. It seems he coasted a bit to much and failed a social studies class. The school decided to up the kids grade to a D and let him graduate, when he had earned an F. They did the scene when the teacher told the kid he had failed. You saw the go on and he said something like 'you cant fail me, Harvard withdraw its acceptence!'

No shit Harvard would. If this kid is so smart to have gotten into Harvard, even in coasting mode, he couldnt have managed a C or D in social studies? He had to have brains to get mostly A's and score well on the SAT's to get in. If he wasnt smart enough to see he needed to pass and just try on one or two tests, not study for hours...but pay attention in class and squeeze out a C, he should fail. Harvard will chew him and spit him out and I say good for him when it does. The parents of the kid were going to sue the school and all that shit....

Screw all that. To get an F, either you really are not smart or you didnt try. I have to assume he was smart, he made it into Harvard...so he didnt try and ya know what? He EARNED that F. He deserved it. Dont give me any shit about it ruining his future and all that nonsense. He's old enough to know that his actions have repercusions, or he should. If he doesnt, he should learn. If you do A then result B will happen. It's that simple. Thats what kids are lacking today. Parents, for good reason, are protective of kids. They want them to have the best of everything and they shield them from life. Toss in movies and games and whatever other mumbo jumbo you want and it all adds up to kids not seeing life differently. They see a world were actions dont have consquenses. Where if you get really pissed and want to shoot someone you go shoot them. Thier minds dont click to the next step, to what happens after that. They are set on the short term, this is what I want and I want it now, so Im going to do this. There isnt a thought that says, 'screw what the results are'. They dont get to the result part. They ask kids what the thought would happen after they commit a crime...and what do they say? "Uh, I dunno. Things would be different" Something like that, different how?? They dont know, they didnt think.

Im on a soapbox, sorry...I'll get off.