"Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habits. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny." -- unknown

Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results - Albert Einstein

i stood on a chair
December 21, 2005 - 9:22 pm

the furor about the differnce.. amuses and befuddles me.

i ate. i drank. i made some small talk. i laughed. i sat. i listened. i waited.

i waited for something i heard about the day before.. something that i'd started dreading the moment i heard it.

the evening pasted. it didn't happen.

dinner was done.. dessert was done.. people were checking watches.

it hadn't happened.

then, one person spoke up... and it began. one by one, around the room we went. one by one.

by chance, i was near the end. simple random seating and starting point, nothing more.

my turn came. my heart thumping. i was standing. i looked at my chair. i looked at the ceiling. i debated, as i'd done a million times waiting for my turn to come.

some said you don't have to, just stand. some said, go on, do it!

i stepped up. i stood on my chair. my head a scant inch from the ceiling.

this.. in a fancy country club. bemused waitstaff listening to our toasts of thanks.. each one of us standing in turn on the chairs.. save the fella four inches taller than me. he didn't need a chair.

i gave a quick toast/thanks and got down.

my heart thumping.

the next person went... and the next and the next.

the night wrapped up. we said goodbyes. we shook hands. we hugged. i slipped out long before saying bye to everyone. that's my way.

i have food for thought. mostly, i think.. oh how things could be different if i didn't think the way i do.

but still, i did stand on the chair.