"Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habits. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny." -- unknown

Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results - Albert Einstein

fine again
July 09, 2004 - 2:40 pm

yep, i'm on total cruise control...gliding towards this august when i'll get my own room and be outta my brother's family's hair/life. actually, more like september when he's back.

until then.. it's all all about keeping an even keel.

i've done this sort of thing before, place an arbitrary deadline off in the future - i've done this many times before.

however, those times i knew it was a pointless thing, that i wasn't quite serious and just wanted a reason to move past things for a bit.

this time, i'm feeling a lot more serious about it.

it's a good amount of time - say 2.5 months to sort things out and decide what's the best route. 2.5 months for loose ends and what not.

2.5 months of looking at the smallest details of life and marveling at the innate absurdity everything contains.

i miss my rants on here about absurdity.

i can't recall why i stopped.. probably got bored with it.

i get bored with everything. nothing quite manages to keep my attention -- or, in terms of people, no one can quite seem to penetrate my defenses. i think that's for the best.

it'd throw my whole world out off balance if someone actaully did something to show they truly cared.

i thought i'd feel some anxity at posting things. i thought i'd feel.. worried or scared. or something.

i don't.

i suppose, i'm just aware now of how everything is going to be fine one day too late and that is just as well.

-- lyrics taken from "fine again" by seether