"Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habits. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny." -- unknown

Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results - Albert Einstein

emotions
2001-09-27 - 5:29 p.m.

i aint happy,

i'm feeling glad

i got sunshine in a bag

i'm useless but

not for long

the future is comin' on

it's comin' on...

i think right now i'm an emotional/mental mess. i got all excited today. i got a voicemail about one of the jobs i applied to. so i'm all excited about that. so, my current emotion is happy.

i'm absolutly pissed at my boss. he's a fucking dick. three weeks ago we were discussing removing accounts from my desk to free up my time to be able to really focus and grow some bigger accounts. to date, he has walked over and _dropped_ twenty-three new account folders on my desk. not asked if i wanted them. not asked my thoughts on if i can handle or want these accounts, just walked up and said 'these are yours'. he flopped seven down on my desk today and if i hadn't been on the phone at the time i woulda told him to kiss my ass. so i guess it's good i was on the phone. i don't get at all how we can talk and agree that i need to remove 'noise' (read that as bullshit accounts) from my desk to adding them to without even discussing it. plus today was bad customer service type day. so my emotion then was pretty fucking pissed.

last night i thought a lot about the last entry i wrote and i realized a couple things about myself that i didn't care to realize. it's things i really knew, but not quite in the words i realized my thoughts in last night. it really is amazing how expressing the exact same idea in just a different word or two, word that are symonyms, everything can take on a whole new meaning. i was rather introspective last night. so my emotion last night was pretty darn depressed.

i think, actaully i'm pretty sure, that if i had my druthers i'd like to go insane (or would it be sane?). i think padded walls might be a nice decorating touch or at the very least to no longer care what anyone else thinks...yes, that would be divine...